I really like blogging. It is useful, easy, therapeutic, enlightening, encouraging, eye-opening, silly and downright fun. I love blog-hopping. Going around to other mom's blogs and seeing "how" they do things. It is so interesting to visit people's links and what makes them tick.
Sometimes it can be very discouraging. Depressing even.
I have found a whole slew of bloggers with daughters from China. That is beneficial to me.
Then there is the train load of homeschool bloggers who inspire and depress me all at once.
There are the photo bloggers, which I love since I so desperately want a Nikon D-80 just for scrapbooking and for fun.
There are so many different takes on "HOW" to live for God and to be a Christian. Several ways of life which all seem to be good, but make me wonder if I'm doing "it" right. As if there is such a thing.
I have come across REALLY domestic women out there whom I adore for their seemingly endless amount of energy and creativity.
The bloggers who are super organized and have all their menus planned out weekly with great tasting healthy meals for the family make me long to be like them.
I love the healthy eating, fitness focused girls whose lives seem to be so out of my reach that I dream of being like them when I grow up.
I absolutely adore looking at family pictures with lots of kids. Just dreaming about my own family that is in the process of being put together.
There are the bloggers who are VERY in tune with the Holy Spirit and they have such Biblical wisdom and insight.
The bloggers that blow my mind are the ones who seem to have gone to "Blog School" to have all the really cool things linked to their site, they built their own site or just have this whole system set up in the Blogoshpere that I have NO IDEA how they have time to do it on top of their life with their families. Who knows?
Some of these people seem like I would love to be hang-out friends with them. Some are just not my cup 'o tea, but interesting none-the-less.
What I find is that if I let myself, I will succumb to the need to feel less than who I am or was created to be. I automatically make everyone else's life better than mine. That is a very dangerous place to be. The Land of Comparison. Thinking everyone has "it" better or has "it" together or that I'm a loser when in fact, I love my life and my family and who I am. I am so grateful that the Lord doesn't sit around comparing me to others.
Do any of you ever feel like this? Like other bloggers somehow got the "memo" about how to be great at life and you weren't logged on at the time and missed the whole thing?
I am reminded that I am put here in this house, with my church, with my friends, with my family, my animals, my trials, my triumphs, my doubts, my hopes, my desires, my purpose "for such a time as this." May I be who God created me to be and nothing more. He is the One to lead me. Maybe I just need to log in to Him more....then my comparison will be with His will and not the Blogosphere.
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21 comments:
Oh, how I know exactly what you're saying. I often have a "preconceived" idea of where we should be right now, and realize the reality of that. I do have to remind myself of how richly blessed we are. We may not have much compared to many, but we have a LOT more than others. I don't mean that in monetary value, but spiritual.
Oh, blog~envy...yup, I have had it myself. I have to stop and bow my head and ask God to forgive me. I sometimes have caught myself with wishing that 'that had happened to me' or that 'my blog was bright and colorful like that' or that I could say something so profound and thought provoking, but alas...I am who I am, my blog is a portion of me.
I try to not fall into blog-envy, but stay thankful and true to the call I have to enter this land of "blog," to share our story and hopefully bring Him glory in the process.
May He use our little spots in this vast blog world, to touch others and draw them to Himself.
less of me and more of Him.
Kimmie
mama to 6
one homemade and 5 adopted
PREACHING TO THE CHOIR!!!
Go here: http://as-for-me-and-my-house.blogspot.com/2007/09/proud-and-proud-of-it.html
O.K., I am off to do my Bible study know!!! :)
Hi there, Panda Mom.
I don't have a blog of my own, but I wanted to comment anyway. I'm new here and this is my first time commenting.
I have been home sick for the past 5 days. (I'm a 4th grade teacher.) On the first day of being home, feeling like I had nothing to do, I stumbled upon your blog. I was immediately interested because my niece and nephew are adopted, and my husband and I are planning on adopting as well. My family holds adoption in extraordinarily high regard. But while your adoption story is what pulled me in, it is not the only thing that made me stay. Over the past 5 days I have read through your entire archives and I have had the best time! I love your honesty and your integrity. I love how you don't try to paint a "perfect" picture of your life, but rather put it all out there so that others can actually relate to what you're saying and to the experiences you describe. I love how REAL you are on this blog! It's interesting to me because the truth is that you and I hold many different values, but your words really have had an effect on me. You seem like a very intelligent, caring, honest person and I have truly been blessed to read the parts of your life you've chosen to share on your blog. Despite some differences between us, I've learned from you, cried over many of your beautiful adoption stories, and laughed out loud at your sillier posts. And I LOVE how respectfully you treat your pets!
I can SO relate to the feeling you describe about other blogs. I've had that thought too, but I just remind myself that other people's lives are just as messy and confusing as mine can be. It takes a brave person to be so real, and ultimately, your words are the ones that are going to really touch people. I know they already have.
I'll stop taking up so much of your comments. But I just really wanted to let you know how much I've enjoyed reading your blog!
Oh yeah - I hear you SO loud and clear on this one. I have been guilty of doing that same thing. I was actually feeling very down on myself the other day and then I read my devotional. It said:
"Stop judging and evaluating yourself, for this is not your role. Above all, stop comparing yourself with other people. this produces feelings of pride or inferiority; sometimes a mixture of both. I lead each of My children along a path that is uniquely tailor made for him or her. Comparing is not only wrong; it is also meaningless." It goes on to describe how GOD sees us: Radiant in His robe of righteousness.
Just keep being who God created you to be and find your affirmation in Him alone. (and I'll try to do the same!)
Love you...and not that my opinion matters, I think you (and your blog) are pretty fabulous!
It's good to read other people's blog and realize you are not alone in your thoughts.
Thank you for your honesty, and I hope you'll find encouragement in knowing that you aren't the only one who struggles with such thoughts as one of the many people in the blogosphere. Being where I am at in life, especially being a seminary student, I often struggle wtih how my blog is going to "sound." So I will sometimes hang on to a draft for days before posting it because I want it to sound just right. What I've learned (still in the process, by the way) is that writing from the heart, from your convictions, is what really matters. I hope that you do receive rest in knowing that you are His, and that He has made you just as you are. You are an encouragement when you don't even realize it, and guess what? It's NOT because you're perfect, but because you are you. You reflect Christ because you are honest about being flawed, a sinner in need of grace, and you are a reflection of the transforming salvation found in Christ alone.
Didn't mean for this comment to go on as long as it did...I love you!!!
Yes, Panda Mom! My sister and I actually took a week long break from looking at blogs last week.
I think the hardest thing about blogging is that people tend to take a "photograph" of their day. When we take pictures of our families, we don't put in albums the ones with us having a scowl on our faces, our kids fighting, etc. You tend to want to remember the "good stuff".
We blog the things we want to remember. Not the times that we yell at our kids. Times we don't measure up. Times where we are lonely, bored, etc. As a result, it looks like we have a perfect thing going.
Hi Panda Mom! I'm Elizabeth's sister, Lauren, and I've enjoyed stopping by your blog from time to time! I think what you have written is very true for many women bloggers. I've talked about this to several friends who blog, and every one of them feels this way. I love blogging in some ways, but I feel like it's gotten out of hand in other ways. Comparison is a struggle for a lot of women (I think it's in our nature), and to go onto the computer and see the best of everyone's day or week just invites that bad feeling of not measuring up into your life each time. I try to limit my blog reading now, and that helps! Thanks for posting this!
"Maybe I just need to log in to Him more".......this was an excellent statement.....it is easy to get caught up in all this blog stuff.....I just stop and remind myself that I am doing this blog for me, for a book to turn into a keep sake for the kids since I feel I put some of the best pictures I can get on it.....and it is just about our daily life...not to show off or beg for comments.....I am who I am.....you can stop by or pass by...it doesn't really matter to me. I believe that people do pray for my family when I ask, and if I have a question, I think people really try and help with an answer. I appreciate that.
BTW.....I think you blog and your family and your beliefs are pretty amazing and I am grateful to have found you through this crazy world of blogging!
Hugs...
Steffie ;)
Hello???? Were we separated at birth???
Blogging has been such a blessing and curse at the same time. I have met amazing, wonderful people (ahem, ahem--YOU) but at the same time I constantly walk away thinking I am inadequate, too simple, untalented, etc., etc. I also believe a lot of people aren't willing to risk sharing the "real" side of their life with others and then that leads more vulnerable readers to think everything is perfect for these people. It is such a false sense of life. I have a whole community of dust bunnies nesting all over my house which needs a big time makeover. My kid has snot on her face half the time despite my efforts to keep her nose clean...You know where I am going...
This has been a bit of an issue for me lately...One day recently I almost walked away from the Osborn Odds 'N Ends blog. I was feeling discouraged. I felt like I didn't have much to say anymore and wasn't sure why I was trying to keep up three blogs. I don't want to be a "popular" blog but just meaningful. Out of the blue I got a private email from someone I didn't know who had been lurking. I won't go into specifics but somehow my blogs had been encouraging her during some very dark spiritual times for her. I was surprised and so happy that God had worked through me to encourage her. I have NO doubt that you have had some incredible impact on someone unbeknownst to you, too.
While blogging can be a great thing, like everything else in life we need to approach it with moderation and balance. I could go on and on... Email me if you ever want to chat privately.
Thanks for your tender, pure, HONEST heart! I adore your blog!
Hugs,
Lisa
So true! Everyone is thinking it and you expressed it perfectly! I agree with Kimmie..."less of me and more of Him":0)
Oh my... you placed into words the angst that follows me when I have concluded visiting bloggy friends and many times end up feeling overwhelmed, underqualified and just plain not worthy. I have to sit myself down and have a "talk" with myself:)
A wonderful friend led me to your blog and well, now I am hooked. Thank you for this kind, tender, insightful post that leaves me feeling normal.
This is what I love about blogging - I love that others lift us up when we struggle. I love that when I find a blog that speaks to my heart, usually I make a friend. And I love that people really are very different while at the same time being very much the same when their authenticity is apparent and quite honestly glowing - your family glows.
Thank you for sharing this message - it certainly spoke to me.
Heather
I DO love this post! I believe many months ago you said something along the lines of People only put up the "pretty pictures" about their lives. This statement hit me like a ton of bricks! I started to feel like I had to keep up with the Bloggers who had it all! I now realize I do not have to OR want to be the best blogger.....I am who I am!
Thanks for the honesty!
Wow, what an excellent post - this really challenged me to examine my heart. Thank you PM for getting to the heart of matters and reminding us of what is truly important. You are a gem! :>
There is nothing I can add to the wonderful posts that many have put unless I want to repeat everything! Thanks for sharing your thoughts! You show us all the time how wonderful your life is and how much you love your family. God richly blesses us in so many ways. Esp. with friends! Love you!
Honey Bun, thank you so much for saying what I think so often in my head!! You are truely an inspiration to me. God has gifted you with the gift of words and the ability to share them in a real and heart-touching way.
Love you to pieces!!
I have never been able to do those weekly menu plans either!
Since we adopted Ellie 4 months ago, I can hardly keep up with my blog at all. I find myself wondering how all these homeschooling-multiple-kids moms do it all! But I do remind myself that everyone has different priorites and people only post what they want the world to see. I love honest posts like this one of yours.
Absolutely I've felt that way. The hard thing for me to wrap my brain around is that I've often picked the best thing about 19 different bloggers and then expected myself to have all 19 'strengths.' But in the end, I'm just me. With one or two strengths and lots of weaknesses. :)
I've had one or two blogs that I loved, but ultimately decided against reading on a regular basis because they made me dis-satisfied with myself in a way that went beyond 'eager to be the best I can be.' I also asked myself, if I were to meet this blogger in person, would we enjoy each other's company? I love encouraging bloggers, but quickly grow tired of disdainful attitudes.
Sometimes I feel like I need to let it all hang out on my blog, but then I remember that a big point of blogging, for me, is to focus on the beautiful and good things in my life. So I try to remember that just because someone only has wonderful things to share in their posts doesn't mean that they aren't real or have struggles similar to my own.
There I go, all long-winded again. Maybe I should go parent, or clean my disasterous house, or run a mile or two (not), or think about starting some school lessons...
We are all on this path together, I think of it as helping eachother along...yes, we can start thinking we don't measure up, but when we really look at it, we are all blessed...just uniquely and differently based on God's choosing. Sometimes, I read funny blogs and I buy the lie that funny is better...or I try to think of a way to be fun and comical....but that is not me and I must be who God made me to be.
You have a very unique and wonderful style about you...and I admire that! Just be yourself, Pandamom and know many of us adore you!!!!
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